with grace in your heart and flowers in your hair

[notverywise]

Logically speaking, Jenny knows she probably shouldn't be so nervous. The thing about it having taken so long — though it isn't as if she knew before yesterday that there was something to take long at all, regardless of how much sense it makes now that both of them have admitted to harboring feelings — is that she knows Cameron, she's comfortable with him, more so than probably any other person on the island. Before, to have gone out together would have been something perfectly normal, during which she'd have kept any thoughts of something more to herself. Now, everything's changed, even if nothing has at the same time. It's absolutely thrilling, leaving her as anxious as she is exhilarated, and certain that this is the happiest she's been since showing up here.

Because the thing is, she hasn't done this before, not really. When she went out with David, nothing ever officially changed; it was just one thing one day, and gradually, other things began to happen, too. She thinks now that that might have been the point from the beginning. So often there were others there, too, Helen and Danny, and even that could be part of the appeal. The more she thinks about it, the more she wonders if it was David she wanted or the life he could give her, and she's fairly certain it was the latter. With Cameron, it's entirely different. She's known him longer and she knows him well, and while it helps that he's so many of the things she'd have gravitated towards back home, it isn't just about that, especially not when so much of that would be irrelevant here. It's just him, and she's wanted him for so long now that this has so much more weight to it.

However much time he waited, she's glad it's now, anyway. Not all of the island's changes are things she's taken to well, the whole idea of moving backwards entirely at odds with the way she approaches most things, but it's certainly convenient for this, giving them actual things to do for a proper date (and just the thought leaves her biting her lip, trying to hold back a smile, though there's no reason for it yet). Now there's nothing but to wait a little longer, which shouldn't be difficult when so many months have passed. Pacing her flat and waiting for him to get here, though, feels a lot more difficult than that ever did.

Comments

[notverywise]

"Well, you have a bit of time to figure it out, still," Jenny jokes, taking a seat on the bench, grateful to be off her feet for a few moments. It will be different when they're skating, but she's lucky to have stayed upright on their way down here, and at least while sitting, she won't have to worry about the possibility of slipping. She has time to really look at him now, too, smile unspeakably fond, heart stuttering in her chest. "And I'll try not to be too hard on you, with everything being so limited normally."

[makeafairfight]

"That's very kind of you," Cameron answers, smiling over at her. There's no mistaking the affection in her expression, which only serves to make his own flare up in return. He squeezes her hand gently before pulling his away so he can lean down to start putting on his skates. "The last thing I'd want is to wind up disappointing you later, especially by starting off so well." He gestures with one hand to the river before them, self-effacing. He does, actually, think that all this is a good start, and if he only manages to put together one great date for her before they're forced into the utterly ordinary, then he'd like it to be their first. Difficult though it is sometimes, though, he's trying, for once, not to take himself too seriously.

[notverywise]

"Well, it's not your fault our options are usually so limited," Jenny says with a shrug, glancing up at him from the laces of her skates. It's been ages since she even wore a pair of these, but it's sort of nice, if only because of the context. She would never have thought to do this on her own, and it would have been a waste of the season if she didn't get a chance to. That it can serve for something like their first date just makes it even better. (She thinks she'd have been thrilled with anything he came up with, just for the simple fact of his wanting to go out with her at all.) "It wouldn't be fair of me to act as if it were."

[makeafairfight]

Reaching over to rest a hand at her back, Cameron leans close to kiss the top of her head, fond. He isn't even sure why he does it, expect that she puts him in such a good mood and she's sweet and the impulse is there, and now that he can give in to so many of those, he doesn't mean to waste the chance. They've done plenty of waiting to get here, and besides, he's never been one to let an opportunity pass him by. However limited their options on the island, should things return to that state, he still means to do the best by her that anyone could. "Make sure you tie those tight," he says. "Don't want you getting hurt."

[notverywise]

"I'll be very careful," Jenny promises, trying to be solemn but not quite pulling it off when she lifts her head to look up at him, a smile playing at the corners of her mouth despite her efforts. He makes it far too difficult not to, especially now that she no longer needs to pretend that she doesn't feel as much as she actually does. Maybe they ought to have done this a long time ago, but she's just glad they're here now, and incapable of pretending otherwise. "I'm hoping to avoid any injuries myself."

[makeafairfight]

"Another thing we have in common," Cameron says lightly. It only takes a minute more before his skates are securely fastened and he sits back, not inclined to rush her when, all jokes aside, it's a matter of her safety. They should be perfectly fine, but he has no desire to see the evening cut short by misfortune. "They just keep adding up."

[notverywise]

"God, whoever would have guessed?" Jenny laughs, smile broadening as she tips her head up towards him. Finishing lacing her own skates, making sure they're tied tightly enough to keep her steady, only takes a moment or two longer, and then she sits up, holding a hand out to him. "Alright. I'm ready if you are."

[makeafairfight]

Cameron takes the offered hand, turning it so he can press a kiss to the back, his gaze still on her. "Always," he says. Getting carefully to his feet, he holds the other hand out to her. It isn't far from the bench to the edge of the river, but he still feels it's better safe than sorry. "Born ready."

[notverywise]

"Were you now?" Jenny asks, teasing, taking his other hand just because she can't see a reason not to. She doubts there's much chance of her actually losing her balance in this short distance, but it won't hurt to be sure, and to have that extra point of contact. "I think that probably makes one of us, but at least there's that."

[makeafairfight]

"Oh, is that so?" Cameron asks, just slightly mimicking her tone as he leads the way to the edge of the river. He's not the best of skaters, though he makes up in balance and speed what he lacks in style, and stepping out without a fence to hold onto for that first step is a bit unnerving, but he manages easily enough. "That's not the impression I've gotten. I think possibly you're... just also particular about what you're ready for."

[notverywise]

"Always coming back to the being particular," Jenny laughs, holding her breath a moment later. She isn't worried, nor is she in danger of falling, but transitioning onto the ice requires a little more care, and she hasn't made it this far to misstep now. "That might not be a bad way of putting it, though." After all, she has been ready for a lot more things sooner than most of the people she knows. That's got to count for something, even if she doesn't want to talk about that now.

[makeafairfight]

"Like I said, nothing wrong with being particular." Cameron himself is, to a point. He tries to be open to all kinds of possibilities, but when it comes to those things to which he truly commits himself, it's necessary to be choosy, to pick carefully, because he devotes himself wholeheartedly. Jenny is a clear example of that, though he can't see how anyone could keep from being devoted to her. He smiles as he looks over at her and the way her cheeks flush in the cold, then, once he's sure she's secure on the ice, starts out for the middle of the river. "Was it like this where you grew up, skating on the river? Or was there somewhere else you went when you did?"

[notverywise]

Though she's fairly good on skates, Jenny keeps a careful hold of Cameron's hand as they make their way farther out onto the ice, relishing the ability to do so as much as anything else. It is helpful, anyway, when she's so determined not to get anything wrong here, well aware of how unflattering it would be if she fell. "No, it was mostly like this," she says, nodding. Somehow, though, between the clothes and the company and the particulars of the setting, it still feels like an entirely different world. There would be nothing half this enjoyable about winters in Twickenham. "When we went, that is, which we didn't always, but sometimes."

[makeafairfight]

"So what did you do?" It's hardly the only winter activity, of course. Cameron got into plenty of alternatives when he was younger, running all over the place and trying everything with Ty. But though he's learned a lot about her over the last several months, he always likes to hear more, figure out more of her history and the things that made up her life before they met.

[notverywise]

"Oh, it was very simple, very boring," Jenny says with a shrug of her shoulders and a laugh. "Everything was, in the town I lived in, and my father didn't help with that at all. Anything fun, he could usually find a good reason for me not to do." She's been hard on him, she knows, if only in her own mind, but some things are true even so, and it can't be pretended otherwise. "But we decorated a tree and all of that. Then again, I think just about everyone does."

[makeafairfight]

"We did," Cameron agrees, nodding. It's easy to pick up a rhythm now, to remember how simple skating is once he actually finds his footing. "And there were Christmas carols, too. It gets very Currier and Ives at our house. Which, I mean, don't get me wrong, I enjoy it." He pulls a slight face, sheepish, aware how entirely cheesy all that can be. It's fun, though, and he's been lucky enough to have a warm, loving family that actually enjoys doing these things together.

[notverywise]

"That does sound fun, though," Jenny says, laughing, steadier on her feet now that they've properly gotten started. It's the reference she appreciates as much as anything else, but that's beside the point. Even if it's a bit cliché, a bit ridiculous, there's something about the Christmas season that makes all of that appealing. "If only for the time of year."

[makeafairfight]

"Oh, no, yeah," Cameron says quickly, grinning, "it is. It is actually a lot of fun." His family may have instilled in him a strong work ethic, but they've also made clear that family and relaxation are important, too. Admittedly, he's taken to one of those better than the other, but that doesn't mean he hasn't loved their traditions. "It's strange to be away from that, honestly, but I guess that was going to happen sooner or later, right?"

[notverywise]

"I suppose," Jenny agrees thoughtfully, head tipping to the side. "Those things always seem to eventually." She'd been all too eager for it back home, ready and willing to leave Twickenham and her dull family behind. It's only in being forcibly removed from them that she finds herself missing life with her parents, if only a little. Nice as it is to not have anyone to answer to, yelling up at her to turn off her record player and study, they were good to her. She doesn't want to think about that, though, when right now, she has it pretty good. "Do you think we ought to take a cue from that for the party?"

[makeafairfight]

"That might be nice," Cameron says, brightening a little at the idea. Leave it to her to think of something like that. He can be a perfect host when it's called for, but it's always been better, he's found, to leave the planning to someone else, if they want the party to be any kind of a success. "A little old-fashioned fun. It would definitely be appropriate."

[notverywise]

"It would, I think," Jenny says, nodding, pleased that the suggestion seems to have gone over well. "In a setting like this, it's practically called for. We might as well embrace it." There's a lot about this she hasn't cared for, she'll make no secret of that, but there's a lot about it that's endearing in its way, and the sort of Christmas he's describing is one that she thinks would go perfectly with all of this Victorian nonsense.

[makeafairfight]

"Be completely absurd and sentimental," Cameron says wryly, giving her hand a brief squeeze as they move along. In truth, he's not actually very good at that, too self-conscious to let himself be absurd, his sentimentality largely restricted to ideals, not people. She makes both of them much easier, for better or worse, and he can't bring himself to mind in the least. "As long as you're prepared for the whole nine yards — we go all out. Candles and cookies and carols. Decorating the tree, maybe."

[notverywise]

"Oh, of course," Jenny says with a laugh, nodding in agreement. "There'd be no point in it if we didn't go all out." To do otherwise would, she thinks, make it seem even more absurd. This way, it will be authentic, something they can all participate in and probably laugh at themselves. They ought to take advantage of the setting instead, put it to some good use with how likely it is not to last very long.

[makeafairfight]

Though there's amusement in her voice, Cameron's smile is wholly genuine when he looks over at her. She's laughing, but it isn't a joke, and it's a sentiment he agrees with wholeheartedly. They're different in a lot of ways, as many as they are similar, but that's one way in which they're absolutely the same. "Especially while we have the means to," he says. "I don't know what they've done in previous years, but this — ah, now this is how you spend a winter."

[notverywise]

"I've heard it's been nothing like this at all," Jenny says, nodding in agreement as she does. "Just a few buildings looking different and snow heaped on top of everything. I much prefer all of this." She'll like it when corsets aren't in style anymore, but aside from that, this seems much more festive, like it's meant to be for Christmas rather than just a sudden appearance of winter. "So we ought to celebrate while we can, you're right."